The Bus

Joey woke up to his brother shaking him.
?The bus,? Josh said, ?is gonna be here any minute.  I can?t believe you forgot
again.?
Joey was only seven years old, but he had to take responsibility for himself in the
morning ever since his mom left three months ago.  His dad told him that she would be
back, that she just went on a vacation for a while, but Josh said that he heard their mom
and dad arguing, and mom said she never wanted to see their dad again.  This frightened
Joey.  He thought that somehow it was his fault.
?Come on,? Josh said, ?hurry!  You remember how mad dad got last time he had
to take you.?
Joey always had trouble getting up on time.  In the past month alone he had
missed his bus six times.  The last time his dad hadn?t talked to him the whole drive to
school.  Joey knew that his dad was really busy at work and didn?t need to waste his time
driving to school all the time.

                                                     *****

Tony Warner had a lot on his mind.  His wife Debra had left him after ten years of
marriage.  They had been going through some problems; she had never gotten over a
miscarriage that she?d had four years ago.  She loved the boys, but she had always
wanted a daughter.  When she found out that she was pregnant with a girl she was
ecstatic.  When she lost their daughter she never recovered.  The arguments usually
started over some trivial item, like the laundry or dinner, but they always ended up with
Debra crying about her lost daughter.  Finally she left.  Tony had expected her to come
back after a week or so by herself, but after the first month he started to lose hope.  He
told everyone that she had gone on a sabbatical; all she needed was some time for
herself.  On the inside, however, he feared that he would never see her again.
Tony was also under a lot of pressure at work.  He worked for a marketing
agency, and had gradually worked up the ranks to become an assistant project director.
The promotion to that position had come shortly after Debra left.  There had been a small
revolution at his firm in which three of the vice presidents had been fired, and the whole
staff was shuffled around to new positions.  Tony knew that these first few months would
be important to prove that he deserved the position he had attained.
In addition to the pressures at work, Tony had to take care of his two boys.  Josh
was nine and Joey was seven, so they were old enough to take care of the basics for
themselves, but young enough to still need supervision.  It bothered Tony that he was not
around enough for them.  He made enough money so that he didn?t have to worry about
their care, but he wanted to be a factor in their lives, not just a monetary provider.  With
his schedule at work, however, he barely saw them for five minutes in the morning
before their bus arrived.  After work he was usually too tired to do anything but watch
television with them.

                                                        *****

Joey threw on his clothes.  He just grabbed a pair of jeans and the first T-shirt he
could find.  Josh had already eaten his cereal and was waiting in Joey?s doorway with his
backpack in hand.
?I?m not waiting for you,?  Josh said as Joey struggled with his shoes and socks,
?you?re going to have to face dad on your own this time.?
Josh left and Joey heard him run down the stairs and out the front door as he tied
his second shoe.  Joey went to the bathroom to brush his teeth, but decided that he didn?t
have enough time.  He went back to his room and grabbed his backpack.  Joey started
running down the stairs and jumped down the last six on his way to the front door.  He
opened the door just in time to see the bus pulling away from the curb.
Joey turned towards the kitchen to see his dad finish cleaning the last of the
breakfast dishes.  He was scared.  His dad had never hit him before, but he had been
awful angry with him last time he had missed the bus.  For a moment he thought of
hiding until his dad left and just skipping school.  Then his dad turned and saw him.

                                                         
                                                          *****

Tony was worried about his sons.  He wanted to be a good father.  A father like
he?d never had.  Tony?s father was from the generation that believed in strong discipline.
Tony had always feared his father as a child.  Things became worse when his father was
laid off from his factory job.  That was when Tony was fourteen.  After that his father
demanded perfection from his son.  Tony would get a beating if he got less than straight
?A?s on his report card at school.  He knew that his father only wanted him to have a
better life than he did, but Tony believed that there was a better way.  He had never been
close to his father, and he deeply regretted it.  He didn?t want his relationship with his
sons to end up the same way.
But there was so much else on his mind.  Tony realized that he barely knew his
two sons.  There was never enough time.  Often, when he did have time with his sons, he
was lost in another world, thinking of work, or Debra.  He realized that he didn?t talk to
his sons even when he was with them.  Something had to change.
Deep in these thoughts Tony turned around and saw Joey standing by the door
looking at him.  He looked at his watch.
?Did you miss the bus again??  he asked, ?Where?s Josh??

                                                           *****
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The Bus
                                                    
Joey stood silent.  His dad looked annoyed with him and Joey didn?t want his
father to know that he was afraid.
?I...I?m...sorry, dad,? he stammered.  His father took a couple of steps towards
him and Joey backed away.

                                                          *****


Joey looked like he was going to be sick.  Immediately paternal concern
overcame Tony.  His mind raced with thoughts of what Joey had eaten, the doctors phone
number, and if he even knew what to do if Joey was seriously ill.
?What?s wrong with you?? Tony said.

                                                          *****

Joey was really scared now.  He had never seen this look in his dad?s eyes before.
?He?s really mad now,?  Joey thought to himself.
Joey cowered from his father and braced himself for the blow he was sure was
coming.

                                                         *****

Tony looked at his son in confusion for a moment before realization
overwhelmed him.
?Joey?s not sick, he?s scared... of me.?  Tony thought to himself.
In Tony?s mind an image flashed of himself when he was fourteen in almost the
exact same position as his son was in now.  He began to cry.